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Articles
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Long Distance Relationships
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John Samuels
http://www.new-dating.com
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Many couples who find themselves in the midst of a long distance relationship find it quite challenging to work with. The main difficulty of course is the absence of physical closeness and intimacy, but there are several others aspects like communication gaps, mistrust and misunderstandings that can creep up to spoil the relationship.
Long distance relationships need to be handled with care simply because it’s much easier to “make up” when you are together than through a phone call or email. Small misgivings take much longer to heal in the absence of physical contact with the partner. There is only so much that you can do with your words.
Here are a few simple tips on how to manage a long distance relationship.
Keep your trust strong – When you are away from your partner it’s quite normal for you to have certain negative thoughts such as – Is she cheating on me or Is he going out with some other girl. Such thoughts can sow the seeds of doubt which can eventually cause you to think negatively about your relationship even when you partner is being completely loyal to you.
How can you be sure that your partner is being loyal to you when you are on long distance? You can’t, but you can trust and find security in that trust. You cannot make a long distance relationship work if you don’t trust your partner unconditionally. Doubt and mistrust have the capacity to end the most innocent relationships. So make sure you unconditionally trust you partner’s fidelity towards you unless you have concrete evidence to the contrary.
You don’t need to call everyday – This might sound counter-intuitive to many but if you really ask the couples who have been in long distance they will tell you that they find it difficult to keep talking everyday simply because they run out of topics to talk about. Many people find it uncomfortable to talk over the phone for long simply because the spells of silence can get bothersome. It’s much easier to talk in person than over a phone.
There is no rule that says that you need to keep calling everyday. It’s not like you have to prove your love to your partner, if that’s the case it’s going to be really tough getting through the long distance period. Just because your partner is not calling you everyday doesn’t mean that he or she does not love you. Love has to be much deeper than words.
Learn to enjoy life even though you miss your partner – It can be emotionally draining if you keep focusing on how much you miss your partner. It’s normal to feel sad, and even depressed, in the absence of your loved one but staying in that state for long can lead to increased negative vibration in your body which in turn have the capacity to attract negative circumstances around you.
The couples who succeed in long distance relationships are the ones who find reasons to keep themselves in a good mood even though they miss their partner. Staying negative is not going to help anyone. Moreover, when you are overly dependent on your partner for emotional support it can be draining for your partner too. Relationship is not about being emotionally dependent on each other, it’s a portal through which you experience giving love and happiness to another.
Stay clear of minor squabbles – The problem with long distance relationship is that there is very little room for squabbles because small misgiving can take on enormous intensity when coupled with frustration you are already feeling as a result of not being together. It’s best to try to keep your communications as simple and as loving as possible. Learn to be forgiving and brush aside any minor offences. Sorting out differences is much tougher over phone than when you are talking face to face.
In conclusion, it’s very true the long distance relationships will test your maturity and your capacity to understand your partner. You can think of it as an acid test of your relationship. Many long distance relationships end up in a break off because the partners are not willing to go the extra mile in trying to be patient, forgiving and understanding.
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John Samuels
http://www.new-dating.com
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